Outside the ropes: Aug. 5. 2016
The following are the opinions of Boxing Don Dinkins and do not reflect the opinions of Undisputed Champion Network as whole…or do they?
Like Marvin Gaye sang, I gotta give it up to Premier Boxing Champions. They staged some outstanding (damn near great) fights this past weekend. That Adonis Stevenson and Thomas Williams Jr. throwdown got things off to a jammin’ good start. The hard punching WBC light heavyweight champ Stevenson looks much younger than his 38 years suggest. I guess all that pimping and trafficking of all that young puddy across state lines obviously keeps a man young. But the man has served his time and now sits atop the light heavyweight division along with “The Mad Russian,” IBF/WBA/WBO light heavyweight titlist Sergey Kovalev. I had seen the hellbent-for-leather/defense-is-boring style of Williams before and this made the champ look even better. Minus all the knockdowns, this barroom brawl took on the appearance of Big George Foreman against Denver, Colorado’s Ron Lyle. Williams’ fuel supply was suspect after just a couple of rounds. Stevenson soon overpowered and stopped “Top Dog” in the fourth with a bazooka of a left hand, leaving the underdog looking like Roy “Rip Van Winkle” Jones Jr. Nobody does “knocked out” the way Roy does.
They didn’t show the whiny, nasally Paulie Malignaggi’s fight, which disappointed me as this was to provide the comedic part of my column. But he won a decision that was, from what I can ascertain, far from memorable. So I had to settle for the whiny one’s commentating for the rest of the evening. Paulie sounds like he’s talking through his damn ears.
Now, I know the Mikey Garcia fight was just a rust-duster after being out for two-and-half years but this Elio Rojas was a sham. He was flopping around like a damn mermaid. He makes Vlade Divac say, “Are you serious?” This guy was dropping from punches to his glove, reminding me of Malik Scott getting KO’d from a Deontay Wilder right hand to the thumb. Rojas made the second Muhammad Ali-Sonny Liston fight look legitimate. To this day, my friends STILL try to convince me that Ali’s bullshit “anchor punch” was real. Here was big, bad Sonny Liston, survivor of TWO fights with the lead-fisted “Big Cat,” Cleveland Williams, flopping around, like…well, like, Rojas. On the run-up to the Garcia fight, this dude, Mark Kreigel was walking in a strawberry field in Oxnard with Garcia (I’m surprised they didn’t play “Strawberry Fields Forever” in the background) as they talked. Kriegel made a half-assed remark to Mikey, “What do you think of the politicians wanting to build a wall on the border to keep out the Mexicans?” (I thought it was to keep out illegal aliens but I could be wrong…). In any event, the deep-thinking Garcia replied, “They don’t know what they’re talking about.” I said, “What the hell?!” I recall a movie called “A Day Without a Mexican,” about how we Americans would all die if they all went home for a day. This Latina friend once said to me, “Yeah Dinkins, we’re gonna teach your ass lesson.” I said, “I’m a slow learner; one day’s not gonna teach me shit. Why not take your ass home and STAY there?!” Hell, Mikey could’ve at least fought Robert Guerrero. He’s an expert at explaining away an ass whippin’ and taking guns to the airport.
Once-beaten WBC featherweight champ, Gary Russell Jr. had a little gerbil crawling around in his ass while talking to IBF beltholder Lee Selby at the commentator’s desk. Selby allegedly made a comment that “Nobody knows who Gary Russell is.” It seemed like he was just a minute away from finding out, judging by Gary’s demeanor. Russell wants to fight Selby for his belt as well as any other worthy featherweights. I’d LOVE to see a redo of Russell and Vasyl Lomachenko. I was at their first fight and “Lomo” administered an ass-whippin’ NONE of the Russell clan will ever forget. That night there seemed to have more Russells in attendance than Watsons (Sam AND his boys). Problem was, there weren’t enough Russells in the ring because Lomo was making ALL the decisions as he trounced Junior.
The main event featuring the always-smiling, previously unbeaten Leo Santa Cruz against the tenacious, pugnacious little Irishman, Carl Frampton was a barnburner of the highest order. Coming on the heels of Keith Thurman-Shawn Porter, that’s a big statement. In a back-and-forth tussle, both warriors were on it from the tip. A lot of the rounds were very close with only one near-knockdown, when Frampton located Leo’s temple with a short left hook, wobbling him in the second round. The strangest comment I heard came from the lips of Santa Cruz’s dad, at the start of the final round, “Now go throw harder punches,” said wise old dad. I really think Leo lost this fight by following his dad’s instructions to fight a more measured fight. Frampton was too crafty for that. Santa Cruz should’ve been his normal swarming self. Before the decision was announced, Frampton’s mentor, and former WBA featherweight champ Barry McGuigan was hunched over in prayer so long, I think God said, “To hell with this” and left. Probably had a late flight to Vegas for his only child, Andre “Oracle” Ward’s fight this weekend. Oh, yeah, Frampton was the winner by majority decision, with some eyebrow-raising scoring.
Speaking of scoring, little whiny-ass Malignaggi was back on it, criticizing judge Tom Schreck for his scoring of fights. What DOESN’T this guy whine about? First he was sniveling because Adrien Broner was dippin’ in his ‘ol lady, then it was Manny Pacquiao on drugs (which he couldn’t prove) and now it’s a judge. He said, when he fought Adrien “I’m not drunk, Judge” Broner, that Schreck must’ve written his score down BEFORE the fight or went to the head during his fight. I choose it was the latter because Paulie sends ME to the head as well.
Well, I’m done, folks, until I’m NOT done, which will be after the Oracle Ward-Alexander Brand fight this weekend. So hands up and chin down, ‘til next time.